Nonsensical whims

I do not often write about my daily activities.

Not because my days are boring [one would hope], and not because they lack in excitement or memorable event - but rather, it is because if I were to start recording my day in writing, I would be inclined to feel the need to do it all again the next day, and the next, and so on... and I know from experience that I will not live up to that self-imposed expectation.
I don't know why I ever entertain such expectations, but maybe it has something to do with the fact that I am somewhat of a devotee to details, and a lapse in the story of my life, once begun, just wouldn't do for my 3 devoted blog followers... And I cannot bear to subject them to such inconsistency!

Of course, I am in jest.
I don't think it would bear much importance at all, really.

I have deduced something, though; I much prefer the challenge of organizing thoughts - taking things invisible and unobserved and building them into structures, with words - than the task of faithfully recording daily activities, for to me, that can become a mechanical observance.

Thoughts appear to me to hold a great deal more mystery than actions; they are still in need of expression, or translation, while actions are self-explanatory, and evident.
And, all things taken into account, thoughts precede actions, so therefore one could conclude that the quality of one's thoughts are of definite relevance to the quality of life one lives.

I also enjoy challenging myself to employ 19th century English grammar and vocabulary, on certain occasions...

That is all.

The Rythyms of Grace

//The more self-aware I become, the more I see that I need to fix.
The more I see that needs fixing, the more I will attempt to try and fix it myself.
The more I try to fix myself in my own strength, the greater the load gets. And the greater the load gets, the more I realize that I will never be able to fix everything.
I have learned that self-awareness at a certain level comes with a price. And that is, the fact that the number of things in me that require fixing will only ever multiply; they become so numerous, these weaknesses, areas of lack, default tendencies, perceptions, fears and reasons begin to fill my mind to capacity. And that in turn, employs all my mental strength.
In other words, there are so many holes in my sack of sand, all of my focus is centered on trying to plug them up, but the sack seems to be made of hemp...

Holes are inevitable.

And if they are inevitable, plugging every single hole is impossible, without living a completely self-centered, inward life.
That was not what we were made for, but so often we find ourselves in that very place - striving and imitating those we perceive to have less "holes" in their sacks. Striving soon results in exhaustion, and an exhausted person is ineffective, and unable to give anything.

Grace: covers the holes
Hope: in eventually receiving eternal freedom from burdens
Faith: to shoulder the load

Awareness, if it takes my mind off what Jesus did at the cross - which is, the salvation of me: an imperfect, blemished person - and puts the focus on all my blemishes, is basically a challenge to Salvation. A test of faith.

At the end of the day, I could know so much about myself and all my weaknesses and areas in my life that need improvement; I could understand and grasp every method needed to fix and correct these areas, but so many begin to appear, it would probably take a lifetime to see it done. A lifetime spent. A life lived in that way would end up being completely self-centered.

The more aware I become, the more reason I have to be thankful for grace; to have faith that I was made to be in partnership with God, because He completes me. His grace is sufficient for me, and His power works best in my weakness. All my hope is in Him.
And what He's done in my life in the midst of my completion - despite all my failures and weaknesses - is what really matters. It's the point. That is how he reveals His goodness, His faithfulness, His generosity, His love and compassion, to others. My life is a message of His love. Through a relationship with you or I, though it would seem so completely incomprehensible, he makes known his passionate desire to be in relationship with every single one of us. The sole core of love is generosity. It is to be shared.
If I am too consumed with my weaknesses, I have no capacity to accept His greatness. In His greatness, God laid aside a royal throne, his pure and radiant divinity and sovereignty - His rights as the Creator of all things - to blend in with mere men, and serve them without accolade or demanding recognition or honor; to die a renegade's death, paying the debt of my sin, and my weakness.
He did it so that I might surrender my incomplete self to him, and receive complete rest.

“Fallen man is not simply an imperfect creature who needs improvement: he is a rebel who must lay down his arms.”

–C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You. - Isaiah 26:3

This is what the Sovereign LORD,
      the Holy One of Israel, says:
   “Only in returning to me
      and resting in me will you be saved.
   In quietness and confidence is your strength.
      But you would have none of it.

                      - Isaiah 30:15 NLT

#Word

I have just been reading a little about the life of G.K. Chesterton.
He has been to me, up until this point, one of those mysterious literary figures of which I know not much, save that He is famous for his writings, and has been much quoted by various Christian scholars.

It is not enough for me to understand that someone is famous, without knowing why. In the end, I am always driven to research, and this is one of those times...

I came across a quote, from His work A Miscellany of Men, and it relates so uncannily to the train of thought in my last post, I was honestly amazed.
And inspired to share it here :)

//It is perfectly true that there is something in all good things that is beyond all speech or figure of speech. But it is also true that there is in all good things a perpetual desire for expression and concrete embodiment; and though the attempt to embody it is always inadequate, the attempt is always made. If the idea does not seek to be the word, the chances are that it is an evil idea. If the word is not made flesh it is a bad word//

~G.K. Chesterton

I have a feeling my reading list is about to expand...

The Wisdom of the Written Word // College Comentaries

WORDS have always fascinated me. The history of them, the construction of them - the weight of them. The opportunity for the creation of something new, buried deep within them.

It occurred to me once that God created the world with his Words, and since the deep-seated revelation of that fact unfolded for me, they have fascinated me even more. There is something significant in the ancientness of a text that is completely compelling; something more to the art of writing than meets the eye. Maybe it's the enduring role of words, and of language; they are the sole agents by which we gain knowledge, understand and learn of our histories and where we have come from, and record and explain our own lives, journeys, beliefs, revelations, thoughts, desires and dreams for future generations to grasp.

Words are a legacy.

 

“If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are rotten, either write things worth reading or do things worth the writing.”  - Benjamin Franklin 

 “Reading maketh a full man, conference a ready man, and writing an exact man.”  - Sir Francis Bacon  

I am part of a local church here in Sydney, and becoming part of this church has shaped my life significantly in the last couple years, so that now, building this church is redefining me. It has become, in essence, Home.

And out of the flow of knowledge and understanding and freedom that I have had the opportunity of receiving here, come my own thoughts and unfolding revelations; they are slowly and steadily shaping who I am and who I was made to be. My goal is that central to all, would emerge the evidence of the WORD at work in me.

In the beginning [before all time] 

was the Word (Christ), and the Word 

was with God, and the Word was God 

Himself. He was present originally with

God. - John 1:1-2 AMP

God created everything through him, 

and nothing was created except through 

him. The Word gave life to everything 

that was created, and his life brought 

light to everyone. The light shines in the 

darkness, and the darkness can never 

extinguish it. - John 1:3-5 NLT

And the Word (Christ) became flesh 

(human, incarnate) and tabernacled 

(fixed his tent of flesh, lived awhile) 

among us; and we [actually] saw His 

glory (His honor, His majesty) such glory 

as an only begotten son receives from his 

father, full of grace (favor, loving-kindness) 

and truth. - John 1:14 AMP

Words flesh out thought, and thought is a root of what makes us who we are.

 

It's who you are, not what you say and do, 

that counts. Your true being brims over into

true words and deeds.  - Luke 6:45 MSG

Whatever is in your heart determines what you say. [Thinking + speaking = being, and will result in doing.] 

Words bridge the divide between soul and body; they are the incarnation of thought, almost. Thoughts can be of the most excellent type and intention and quality and value, but unless uttered, or written, are rendered worthless. And even when written, until they are read, remain weightless.

Thought precedes Word, yet without Word, thought becomes irrelevant. Words are key.

Paradoxically, words can be plagiarized, recited, emptily repeated and stolen. Thus, maintaining the integrity of my heart and thoughts becomes the goal, for if I'm desiring to please God, which I am, I have understood that he desires honesty from the heart.

For I was born a sinner - yes, 

even from the moment my 

mother conceived me. But

you desire honesty from the 

heart, so you can teach me

to be wise in my inmost

being. - Psalm 51:5-6 NLT

Above all else, guard your 

heart, for from it flow the

springs of life. - Prov 4:23 NLT

I am the the result of a direct thought of God. He spoke his thoughts, and the world was born. Humanity was birthed.

The counsel of the LORD

stands forever; the thoughts

of His heart through all 

generations. - Psalm 33:11 AMP

How great are Your doings,

O Lord! Your thoughts are

very deep. - Psalm 92:5 AMP

Search me [thoroughly], O 

God, and know my heart!

Try me and know my thoughts!

- Psalm 139:23 AMP